Whether you’re out and about with a guy or sitting at home texting him, you might be surprised to hear him say, “I’m hungry.”
After all, saying “I’m hungry” isn’t the same as suggesting a plan for getting food.
It might feel like the guy you’re with is letting you know that he would like food and expecting you to figure out a way to get him some.
You might even find yourself at a loss for words and wonder why this perfectly capable human has to announce his hunger can’t just feed himself.
Don’t worry, though, this article has you covered and offers a ton of possible responses to “I’m hungry.”
You’ll definitely find a comeback or reply that fits your needs here.
42 great ways to respond when a guy says, “I’m hungry.”
- Hi Hungry, I’m Jane, nice to meet you.
- Like…constantly? Or just right now?
- What else is new?
- For food or clout?
- I’ve heard you can die from that.
- Just as long as you’re not hangry.
- I’m playing the tiniest violin for you.
- Don’t be such a man-child and make yourself some food 🙄
- Why are you telling me that?
- What am I supposed to do about that?
- How much of your personality is just being perpetually hungry?
- I can’t help you with that, sir.
- Stay hungry, stay foolish.
- Are you ever not?
- I’d be more surprised if you told me you weren’t hungry.
- Okay, you bottomless pit, we just ate.
- That must mean you haven’t reached your seven bazillion daily calories yet.
- You should eat something then.
- If only there were a way to fix that problem.
- Sooorrrryy….[Send a picture of really good food that you’re currently eating]
- [Send a stream of pictures of great food] Is this helping?
- What was the last thing you ate?
- Shall we meet for lunch? I get an hour off work.
- Want to grab a bite to eat together?
- What would your ideal meal be right now?
- How hungry are you, on a scale from 1 to 10?
- You need to start feeding yourself properly.
- That’s because you never take your lunch break. You need to start taking better care of yourself.
- If you order pizza, I’ll come over. Extra pepperoni, please.
- Stop procrastinating by talking to me and make yourself some food.
- I was just going to cook dinner…do you want to come over?
- Me too! Where shall we go on our date this evening?
- What’s your favorite cuisine?
- My tummy is growling…shall we meet a bit earlier for our date?
- Are you asking me out to dinner?
- What are you hungry for?
- Well, I’m thirsty.
- Stop it, you.
- …hungry for my love?
- I can probably satisfy that hunger.
- You’re trying to get me to invite you over here, aren’t you?
- Come over and I’ll cook my favorite dish for you while making ASMR sounds with all the pots and vegetables…
The funniest responses to a guy saying, “I’m hungry”
Often, the most appropriate response to a guy telling you that he’s hungry is to make a joke.
Bantering your crush or boyfriend doesn’t mean you can’t also make practical arrangements to go have lunch or dinner together. Plus, when there’s such a wealth of funny responses to “I’m hungry,” it would be a waste not to use them.
Not sure why a reply to “I’m hungry” would be funny? Check out these suggestions for how to poke fun at a guy for informing you that he needs to intake calories.
1. Hi Hungry, I’m Jane; nice to meet you.
This is a classic joke that works in a wide variety of circumstances. If someone tells you how they feel and starts by saying, “I am…” you can joke that it sounds like they’re telling you their name.
Use your real name for this response.
You might only get a half-hearted chuckle or an eyeroll for this dad joke, but as long as you’re entertaining yourself, that’s all that really matters, right?
2. Like…constantly? Or just right now?
The other double meaning of “I am…” statements comes from the fact that we use them to describe permanent characteristics too. It wouldn’t be uncommon for someone to say, “I am stubborn,” to describe their general demeanor.
This reply to a guy is based on pretending to think he might be using hungry in the same way that someone would use “tough” or “outgoing.”
3. What else is new?
Let’s just hope that the guy telling you he’s hungry knows you well enough for this kind of informal chat. I mean, “I’m hungry” wouldn’t be a great thing to text a girl after a first date. At least, not if you’re hoping to ask for a second date.
If you do know a guy well and he tells you he’s hungry in a very casual way, chances are he’s the type to be hungry relatively often.
If your forever-hungry boyfriend mentions he wants to eat, you can respond with the clever reply “What else is new?”
4. For food or clout?
Is your crush a bit of a status-conscious social climber?
If you’re dating a Leo man, or just a life-of-the-party, charismatic guy, he probably isn’t averse to a bit of name-dropping.
When he says he’s hungry, poke fun at him by suggesting you aren’t sure whether he is actually hungry or just hungry for attention.
5. I’ve heard you can die from that.
This joke has quite a few layers to it. Of course, you can die from hunger through starvation…but in all likelihood, your guy is nowhere near that.
So, on the one hand the joke works because it is literally true that one can die from not getting enough food.
And on the other hand it works because he’s being whiny about something that is very easily solved and that he is absolutely not going to die from.
6. Just as long as you’re not hangry.
Is there anything worse than being hangry? Yes, actually, there is: dealing with a hangry person.
If your boyfriend is particularly prone to being unpleasant to be around when he hasn’t had enough food, you can reply “as long as you aren’t hangry” when he says he’s hungry.
Maybe he’s the type of guy who makes you respond to “maybe” and is super non-committal and unhelpful when he hasn’t been properly fed.
If you notice that you and your boyfriend get in far more arguments when he hasn’t eaten enough, you can avoid having a guy call you crazy by making sure he’s had food.
And of course, you can make fun of his mood swings every chance you get…except, of course, when he actually is hangry.
7. I’m playing the tiniest violin for you.
The terms “man-child” and “man flu” don’t exist for no reason.
If your husband, boyfriend, or male crush tells you he’s hungry to try to get a bit of sympathy, you can respond by joking that you’re playing a tiny violin for him.
What does this mean? Well, “the world’s smallest violin” is an idiom that one references when making a show of mock sympathy to someone who is complaining for no real reason.
8. Don’t be such a man-child and make yourself some food 🙄
If you’re talking in person, that emoji can be transformed into a real-life eyeroll.
Whether you’re talking in person or are exchanging messages back and forth on your phones or online, a bit of tough love won’t hurt.
Just make sure that if you’re texting, don’t tell him off for his laziness too much, or he might start to worry that you’re friendzoning him over text.
9. Why are you telling me that?
Is a guy who you had several enjoyable evenings with and who knows how to be a total gentleman on a date, now telling you out of the blue that he’s hungry?
If your answer is, “Yes, that’s exactly what’s happening,” you’d be forgiven for being a little confused.
After all, what does this grown man expect you to do about his hunger? Isn’t that a problem only he can solve?
By jokingly asking why on earth he’s telling you that, you’ll embarrass him just enough to get him to pull himself together.
10. What am I supposed to do about that?
Not sure what a guy thinks you’ll be able to do to help him resolve his whole “hunger problem”?
That’s fair enough.
You can respond with funny retort that gets across how silly it is for him to tell you he’s hungry without telling you why that information is relevant to you.
The situation would be different, after all, if he said, “I’m hungry. Want to get something to eat?”
11. How much of your personality is just being perpetually hungry?
Are things going well with the person you’re dating? If you feel like you spend every other minute responding to a compliment from a guy, you can start to up the humor in your relationship.
A healthy bit of jeering helps move a relationship forward.
Joking with a guy by asking him what percentage of his personality is just the state of being hungry is a good way to introduce a teasing dynamic.
12. I can’t help you with that, sir.
…I mean, you can’t, right?
So, call a spade a spade and tell the guy you’re texting that he’s going to have to help himself when it comes to feeding himself.
As much as he impressed on the first date, you aren’t going to be spoon-feeding him.
13. Stay hungry, stay foolish.
If he gets it, he gets it.
If he doesn’t, you may find yourself giving a summary of Steve Jobs’ professional career, starting with his self-professed motto, “stay hungry, stay foolish.”
Either way, this is one of those jokes that is funny because of the dissonance it creates. The guy you’re texting won’t quite know what to say, and keeping him on his toes is a great way to get a guy to chase you.
14. Are you ever not?
If you are forever hearing the guy you’re seeing tell you that he’s hungry, this is a good way to point out that he is rarely not thinking about or mentioning food.
15. I’d be more surprised if you told me you weren’t hungry.
This reply to “I’m hungry” from a guy makes the same point as the previous one.
It is slightly harsher, so which one you go for depends on how well you know the guy you’re talking to.
If you’ve already established a great and witty rapport with him and have decided he’s definitely a date worth keeping, this is the one to go for.
16. Okay, you bottomless pit, we just ate.
If he is saying, “I’m hungry” to make fun of himself because the two of you have just parted ways after sitting down for a meal together, you can join in on the joke.
Whatever you just ate, it’s funny to point out that the guy you’re chatting with has no legitimate reason to be hungry so soon after you’ve had food.
Calling him a bottomless pit is a good way to express that, based on your experience of his eating habits, you doubt he ever feels full.
However, do be careful with this one. If a guy struggles with body dissatisfaction or is insecure about being a little on the heavier side, this might not be the right message to send.
This makes a great response for the guy in your life who can eat about ten whole portions of Thanksgiving dinner and still look as thin as a rake.
17. That must mean you haven’t reached your seven bazillion daily calories today yet.
If you are dating an athlete or a guy who is busy all the time, you’ll get used to the fact that most of your conversations happen over the sound of them putting food in their face.
Whether he is eating for the “gainz” or because this is the only time in his day when it is socially acceptable for him to be intaking calories, you can make this joke.
If he’s always worried about making sure he gets enough food in per day, you can respond to “I’m hungry” by saying it’s because he hasn’t eaten the ridiculous amount he usually does.
18. You should eat something then.
Sometimes the funniest jokes are the simplest ones.
If a guy says he’s hungry, tell him he should eat something.
If nothing else, he’ll get a chuckle out of your dry humor. Feel free to jump on the bandwagon of using an upside-down smiley when flirting, and follow this message up with a 🙃.
This emoji notoriously enhances dry humor, so it would be perfect at the end of this witty quip that’s as dry as Dom.
19. If only there were a way to fix that problem.
Jokes are always funnier when you explain them, right?
So, here’s your explanation: the way to fix the problem of hunger is to eat. This is blatantly obvious, which makes this a funny comment.
20. Sooorrrryy… [Send a picture of really good food that you’re currently eating]
Ah, timing is everything.
If you get an “I’m hungry” text from a guy while you just happen to be tucking into an incredible burger, tell him you’re sorry-not-sorry and send him a great picture of your meal.
This is a great way to get a conversation underway because there’s no way he won’t respond.
21. [Send a stream of pictures of great food] Is this helping?
Even if you don’t personally have food in front of you, you can still use the aid of the wonderful internet to give the guy you’re texting a hard time.
Send a string of photos of mouthwateringly good-looking meals.
If you happen to be dating a nerd who loves a good meme, you can delve into the world of food memes, of which there are many.
Why not send along the best food memes the internet has to offer. Sense of humor is key to compatibility and is also a sign of intelligence, so show him he is dating a smart girl by selecting the funniest ones there are.
The smartest practical responses to a guy saying, “I’m hungry”
If you’re 100 percent sure that the guy you’re chatting with is just genuinely hungry, you can rest assured that he’s telling you this for one of two reasons.
Either he wants sympathy (or a suggestion for how he can feed himself), or he’s indirectly proposing getting together to grab some food. That’s ideal if you want to say yes to a date without appearing desperate. You don’t even have to say “yes,” you can just say, “do you want to get food then?”
You’ll have to work out which one of these two scenarios applies in your situation. If he’s just out here looking for sympathy, revisit the funny responses listed above.
Hunger is a condition we all experience about three times per day, so there wouldn’t be enough sympathy to go around if we all felt bad for each other for feeling a bit nibble-y.
However, if he’s hinting at making plans, you can give him a helping hand and suggest sitting down for a meal together.
22. What was the last thing you ate?
If the guy you’re speaking to is just telling you, “I’m hungry” because it naturally fits into conversation, for example, because you asked how he was, you can respond neutrally.
Just asking what he last ate will give you more concrete information about the nature of his hunger.
And since his hunger is the current topic of conversation, this is a natural follow-up question.
23. Shall we meet for lunch? I get an hour off work.
If you think a guy is actually proposing getting together for a meal but isn’t quite sure how to ask you out, you can take the reins and suggest meeting up.
Keeping your first date plans simple will help ensure that the date goes well.
24. Want to grab a bite to eat together?
This is a good, quick way to ask someone whether they want to go out with you without putting too much pressure on the situation.
Dating can be intimidating, especially when there is a lot at stake.
For example, if you are dating a single dad, you might be thinking that any suggestion of a serious commitment before you’re both ready would throw a spanner in the works.
Keeping things as lowkey as possible in the early stages of dating is a great way to get things off the ground.
25. What would your ideal meal be right now?
If, for whatever reason, there is no real possibility that the two of you could get together for food, you can just treat his expression of hunger as a conversation starter.
Have you ever listened to a podcast where they ask the guest what their death row final meal would be? The question is based on the fact that death row inmates get to request the full contents of their final meal.
If you don’t want to be as morbid as all that and prefer to keep things relatively lighthearted, you can simply ask the guy you’re texting what his ideal meal would be.
Hungry people like thinking about food, so you’re sure to get a pretty quick response. If your aim is to keep the conversation going, this is an ideal response to a guy telling you he’s hungry.
26. How hungry are you, on a scale from 1 to 10?
This is really just filler. I mean, do you really care whether a guy is a 2 hungry or an 8 hungry? I’m going to assume not.
But to keep conversations going, we sometimes have to talk about things that we don’t actually find all that interesting.
A comment as boring as “I’m hungry” might well require you to feign interest in what you’re talking about for a few minutes.
But a few boring minutes of conversation here and there don’t mean that you don’t have a future together, and definitely don’t need to put you off saying, “I love you” for the first time.
27. You need to start feeding yourself properly.
Part of being in a relationship with someone is making sure they are looking out for themselves.
If you have a guy’s best interests at heart, you might have noticed that he isn’t always great at making sure his basic human needs are met (think food, shelter, water, sleep, etc.).
Encourage him to look out for himself by telling him to start feeding himself properly.
28. That’s because you never take your lunch break. You need to start taking better care of yourself.
If you know the guy you like basically works 24/7 and never cuts himself slack, you can point out that the reason he’s hungry is probably because he didn’t eat lunch.
Telling him that he needs to start taking better care of himself is a way of expressing that you are worried about him, which he’ll definitely appreciate.
29. If you order pizza, I’ll come over. Extra pepperoni, please.
If you suspect that a guy is texting you about his hunger because he’s about to order food and is wondering whether you want in, you can say it like it is: if he gets pizza, you’re there.
Adding the specifics of your desired order to the end of your message adds a bit of humor to the whole thing.
30. Stop procrastinating by talking to me and make yourself some food.
If you’re comfortable with the guy you’re seeing and have no problem bossing him around when he’s messing about, this is an ideal response to “I’m hungry.”
Being in a relationship is about looking out for each other.
So, in the same way that he would know what to text his girlfriend when she’s sad, you should know how to encourage your boyfriend to eat when he’s hungry.
31. I was just going to cook dinner…do you want to come over?
If your guy knows that you’re a great cook who spends her evenings at the stove prepping something delicious and nutritious, he may be angling for an invite by saying he’s hungry.
If you aren’t opposed to his company, and you are already in discussions about how soon is too soon to move in together, you can invite him over when he says he’s hungry.
32. Me too! Where shall we go on our date this evening?
If agreed to a date in advance, and your date was just checking in on the day to confirm it, he might let slip that he’s hungry in the hopes that you can go to a “big portion” restaurant.
Pick up on his enthusiasm (and his desire for lots of food) and ask him where he’d like to head to on your date.
33. What’s your favorite cuisine?
You could ask this purely as research, or you could ask it as an intro to a longer conversation that ends with you cooking food for the two of you.
Once he’s revealed his preferred type of food, you can come up with a plan for how to source it.
34. My tummy is growling…shall we meet a bit earlier for our date?
If you suspect that the guy you’re meeting for a second date later in the evening wants to move your date forward, this is an ideal reply.
Ultimately, there’s no harm in getting to spend a bit more time together than you had initially reckoned with.
Adding in the detail about your tummy growling makes your interest in getting together sooner seem genuine, whether or not it is based on hunger.
Excellent flirty responses to a guy saying, “I’m hungry”
Of course, food isn’t the only thing he might be hungry for. Hunger is often used as a metaphor. If that’s the case in the situation you find yourself in, make sure you pick up on this and don’t start talking about pizza, thereby making it clear that his comment has gone over your head.
Here are a few flirty ways to navigate replying to a suggestive “I’m hungry” text from a guy.
35. Are you asking me out to dinner?
If you think a guy is asking you out without actually asking you out, you can make the first move and ask whether he is actually trying to suggest meeting up to have dinner.
There’s nothing wrong with jibing him a little either, as you make your way toward dating. This just saves you the trouble of having to learn to jeer each other further down the line.
36. What are you hungry for?
If you think that a guy is being suggestive by telling you he’s hungry, and that his hunger has nothing to do with a burger and fries, call him out with this call-it-like-it-is reply.
37. Well, I’m thirsty.
You two are certainly staunch supporters of the food and beverage industry…or just really into each other…who can say for sure?
38. Stop it, you.
If you know what the guy you’re talking to is hinting at, but aren’t one to get carried away with flirty banter, you can just tell him to cool it with this authoritative response.
39. …hungry for my love?
As cheesy as this line is, there’s a time and a place for over-the-top romance, isn’t there?
Even if a guy was literally only referring to hunger of the stomach, you could still opt for this lighthearted, silly line that will leave him in no doubt about your interest in him.
40. I can probably satisfy that hunger.
Whether you’re looking to cook a meal for the two of you to share, or satisfy his hunger in some other sense, this line is a 10/10 response.
Showing the guy you’re texting that he’ll have to work hard to keep up with your banter will intrigue him and make him wonder how soon a second date can be.
41. You’re trying to get me to invite you over here, aren’t you?
If you mentioned earlier that you were cooking, and the guy you’re chatting to comes back with an “I’m hungry” text, it’s safe to assume he’s fishing for an invite for dinner.
42. Come over and I’ll cook my favorite dish for you while making ASMR sounds with all the pots and vegetables…
If silly is basically your middle name, your flirting style will probably match that vibe.
Joking about combining ASMR sounds with food prep will let your crush know you’re not just any girl, and that he’ll have to stay alert if he wants to keep up with your humor.
Hey, it’s me, Steven. Dating and relationships have always fascinated me. On Dategosu, you will find my best tips to make sure your next date is a great success!