Skip to Content

The 30 Best Ways to Respond when a Friend Ghosts You

The 30 Best Ways to Respond when a Friend Ghosts You

Friendships are an essential part of our lives. But for some reason, they are often considered less important than romantic relationships. 

As a result, while we spend hours and hours analyzing our relationships with people we date, we spend far less time talking about the nuances of friendship. 

But friendships can be just as complicated and can give rise to just as many tricky-to-navigate situations.

For example, what should you do if a friend stops responding to your messages? 

Here is a run-through of the best messages to send a friend who is ghosting you.  

 

How to respond when a friend ghosts you

Friendships are an essential part of our lives. But for some reason, they are often considered less important than romantic relationships. 

As a result, while we spend hours and hours analyzing our relationships with people we date, we spend far less time talking about the nuances of friendship. 

But friendships can be just as complicated and can give rise to just as many tricky-to-navigate situations.

For example, what should you do if a friend stops responding to your messages?

Here is a run-through of the best messages to send a friend who is ghosting you.  

 

  1. Hey, it’s been a while since we talked. I just wanted to check in to see how you are doing.
  2. Hey there. Don’t be a stranger, how are you?
  3. Hey, it’s been a few weeks since you got back to me. I miss you. Is everything okay?
  4. Hey dear, has something happened? Really missing you. 
  5. Hi, I feel like you’re ghosting me. Could we talk sometime? I would love to have an honest conversation about how you’re feeling. 
  6. Hey, I haven’t heard from you in ages. I’m worried about you. Are you okay? If you need anything at all, please call me.
  7. No need to respond if you’re feeling badly, but I just want you to know how much I care about you. Let me know if there is anything I can do. I miss you so very much and hope we can hang out soon. 
  8. Hey, you aren’t responding, which makes me think you may be feeling bad again. I hope I can brighten your day by sending you this list of my five favorite things about you: You’re hilarious, you’re deeply caring, you are stunning, you always make sure everyone has enough food, and you give the best hugs. 
  9. Hey, is everything okay? You haven’t responded for a few weeks. Are you angry with me?
  10. Hey, I honestly feel really sad that we aren’t talking anymore. I don’t understand what happened to make you stop responding to me. Could we talk sometime? 
  11. I’m devastated that our friendship is ending like this. We’ve been so close for so long. Don’t you think we should at least talk about this? 
  12. I understand that you’re upset about what happened between us, but completely cutting me out of your life feels like an extreme response. Can’t we talk things through? 
  13. So, since you haven’t responded to me for literal ages, I’m assuming you’re still angry about what happened. I think the way you’re treating me is really unfair. I’m going to stop reaching out to you after this message, but if you want to get in touch, I still want to talk. 
  14. Hey, we’ve somehow gone from texting all day every day to never talking at all. I assume something has happened, but I don’t know what. Are you mad at me? I’m happy to talk over whatever might be upsetting you, so please give me a call. 
  15. Hey, so I’m assuming you’re angry with me because of what happened. I’m hurt that you have just dropped me out of your life, especially because I think we both contributed to that situation. Can we please talk about this? 
  16. Hey, I feel like we haven’t spoken much since you moved away. It makes me really sad since I consider you one of my best friends. Could we make plans to get together sometime? 
  17. Hey, so do we just not talk anymore now?
  18. Hi, is there a reason you’ve been ignoring my messages? 
  19. Hey, I know you’ve made new friends, but I’m really hurt that you’ve just stopped responding to me. 
  20. Hi, I’ve written you multiple times over the last few weeks and you haven’t responded. I feel like now that you have made new friends, you have kind of dropped me, which really sucks. To be frank, I feel used. 
  21. Hey, everything okay? It’s been weeks since we talked and I feel really confused by the fact that you aren’t responding. 
  22. Hey, you alive? 
  23. Hellooooo?!? Is this still your number? 
  24. So, are you still coming to my event on Monday? Just asking because I’m counting on you, but you seem to have dropped off the face of the earth. 
  25. Do you live under a rock now, or what? 
  26. Earth to [insert name], I repeat, Earth to [insert name].
  27. Um…what’s going on? Why have you just stopped responding to me?
  28. Hey. Um, do you want to explain why you’ve been ignoring my calls for weeks? 
  29. So, I guess we’re not friends anymore? 
  30. Like, I swear at this point I’m worried you’ve died…what on earth is going on? 

 

How to respond when a friend ghosts you if you are worried about them 

One of the most common reasons why people ghost is that they are struggling with poor mental health or are just generally feeling unhappy. 

If a friend who you know is prone to bad mental health stops responding to you, the best thing you can do is express concern and let them know that you care about them and want to see them. 
 

1. Hey, it’s been a while since we talked. I just wanted to check in to see how you are doing.

If you suspect someone isn’t feeling well and want to reach out to let them know you want to support them, this is a straightforward text to send. 

It acknowledges that time has passed since you talked and lets your friend know that you care deeply about how they are.   
 

2. Hey there. Don’t be a stranger, how are you?

If a relatively good friend stops responding to your messages out of the blue, this is a good text to send to check in. 

It doesn’t express so much concern that it will make them feel bad for worrying you, but it makes it clear that you are thinking about them and that you would like to hear from them.
 

3. Hey, it’s been a few weeks since you got back to me. I miss you. Is everything okay?

Another way to approach the situation is to point out that it has been a few weeks since you heard from your friend.

Then, let them know you miss them and ask if everything is okay.

This is sure to make them feel that they are being unfair to you and should at least let you know why they aren’t getting back to you. 

 

4. Hey dear, has something happened? Really missing you. 

Don’t be afraid to ask a friend who is ghosting you whether something has happened.

This implies that you assume something must be wrong for them to suddenly be ignoring you.

Letting them know you really miss them will make them feel that they are cared about, which may mean a lot to them if they are having a difficult time. 
 

5. Hi, I feel like you’re ghosting me. Could we talk sometime? I would love to have an honest conversation about how you’re feeling. 

Don’t be afraid to let your friend know that you feel like they are ghosting you. 

After all, even if the reason they aren’t responding is because they are feeling unwell, it isn’t kind to just cut people out of your life. If they understand how their actions are affecting you, they may be more likely to get back in touch.
 

6. Hey, I haven’t heard from you in ages. I’m worried about you. Are you okay? If you need anything at all, please call me.

When someone isn’t doing well, the best thing to do is to let them know that they have your support. 

If a friend is ghosting you and failing to respond to your messages, let them know that they can call you if they need anything. If they feel like they can reach out to you to lean on you, they may just get in touch. 
 

7. No need to respond if you’re feeling badly, but I just want you to know how much I care about you. Let me know if there is anything I can do. I miss you so very much and hope we can hang out soon. 

One of the most compassionate messages you can send to someone who isn’t responding to you is to let them know that there is no pressure to respond. 

Let them know you care about them and that you miss them. 

Even if they don’t get in touch right away, they will remember your kind words when they start to feel better and will be sure to apologize for their absence and thank you for your support. 
 

8. Hey, you aren’t responding, which makes me think you may be feeling bad again. I hope I can brighten your day by sending you this list of my five favorite things about you: You’re hilarious, you’re deeply caring, you are stunning, you always make sure everyone has enough food, and you give the best hugs. 

If you are fairly sure that the reason someone is ghosting you is because they are having a hard time, then send them a list of all the things you love about them. 

You never know just how much this kind of selfless, loving act might mean to them. 

How to respond when a friend ghosts you Pin 2
 

How to respond when a friend ghosts you because they are angry

When a friend ghosts you and you suspect that it is because they are mad at you, you may feel conflicted about reaching out. 

After all, you don’t want to have to convince someone to be friends with you. 

However, if you used to be close to someone and they have stopped responding to your messages, the mature thing to do is to reach out one last time to ask if you can talk things through. 
 

9. Hey, is everything okay? You haven’t responded for a few weeks. Are you angry with me?

This message keeps things short and to the point.

Ask your friend if they are okay and point out that they aren’t responding. Then simply ask them whether they are angry with you.

If they are mad, you have given them the perfect opportunity to address what they are feeling.

And well, if they still don’t respond, then you can move on knowing you tried your hardest to make it work.
 

10. Hey, I honestly feel really sad that we aren’t talking anymore. I don’t understand what happened to make you stop responding to me. Could we talk sometime? 

When a friend ghosts you, you may feel a mix of emotions, including anger, frustration, and hurt. 

Since you are effectively losing a friend, you may also feel extremely sad.

Don’t hesitate to let your friend know this. If they hear that you are motivated by sadness and not anger, they will be more likely to feel compassion and reach back out to you.
 

11. I’m devastated that our friendship is ending like this. We’ve been so close for so long. Don’t you think we should at least talk about this? 

Let your friend know that you are devastated about the way your friendship seems to be coming to an end. 

This will make them think back on all the experiences you’ve had together and think twice about whether their current anger justifies throwing that all away.  
 

12. I understand that you’re upset about what happened between us, but completely cutting me out of your life feels like an extreme response. Can’t we talk things through? 

While many people who are ghosted simply leave things as they are and stop reaching out to the person ignoring them, this can lead to having to suppress feelings. 

Just because someone else has decided to cut you off, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get to say the things you need to say to them. 

Letting someone know that you think their reaction is extreme may help you move on from the end of the friendship in the long run.
 

13. So, since you haven’t responded to me for literal ages, I’m assuming you’re still angry about what happened. I think the way you’re treating me is really unfair. I’m going to stop reaching out to you after this message, but if you want to get in touch, I still want to talk. 

This response allows you to get your own frustration with your friend off your chest.

Telling them you think their behavior is unfair will make you feel like you have been able to have your say too.

Extending an olive branch at the end of the message will leave you knowing that you did everything you could to repair the friendship. 
 

14. Hey, we’ve somehow gone from texting all day every day to never talking at all. I assume something has happened, but I don’t know what. Are you mad at me? I’m happy to talk over whatever might be upsetting you, so please give me a call. 

This is a good response to send a friend who is ghosting you if you aren’t sure why they are angry with you. 

By letting them know you don’t understand their behavior but are open to talking things through, you are definitely taking the high road. 
 

15. Hey, so I’m assuming you’re angry with me because of what happened. I’m hurt that you have just dropped me out of your life, especially because I think we both contributed to that situation. Can we please talk about this? 

If you know or suspect why your friend is angry with you and is therefore ghosting you, let them know that their behavior is hurtful. 

Saying that you both contributed to the situation that led to the breakdown of your relationship will bring home to them that they have also made mistakes and that it might be good to discuss whatever it was that happened between you. 
 

How to respond when a friend ghosts you because they have made new friends

One of the most hurtful things that can happen during a friendship is for one friend to start distancing themselves because they have met new people and are prioritizing hanging out with them.

If you suspect that your friend is not responding to you because they have made new friends, you could send any of the following responses.  
 

16. Hey, I feel like we haven’t spoken much since you moved away. It makes me really sad since I consider you one of my best friends. Could we make plans to get together sometime? 

If your friend moves away and then stops texting, you may feel abandoned two times over. This is the perfect thing to send your friend if you find yourself in this situation. 
 

17. Hey, so do we just not talk anymore now?

This message is straightforward and clear. 

You don’t always have to go into how everything is making you feel. Sometimes it is just as powerful to simply ask your friend if their decision to ghost you is permanent. 
 

18. Hi, is there a reason you’ve been ignoring my messages? 

If you just want a clear answer about what is happening in your friendship, simply ask your friend why they are ignoring you. 
 

19. Hey, I know you’ve made new friends, but I’m really hurt that you’ve just stopped responding to me. 

If you don’t want to have to tip-toe around the real issue and would like to call your friend out on their behavior directly, let them know that you are hurt that they have ditched you for new friends. 

Once you have sent this text, the ball is their court. They can either explain themselves and rebuild your friendship or leave things the way they are. 
 

20. Hi, I’ve written you multiple times over the last few weeks and you haven’t responded. I feel like now that you have made new friends, you have kind of dropped me, which really sucks. To be frank, I feel used. 

If you feel like your friend who is ghosting you has used you, tell them this. 

If they care enough about you they will be sure to reach out to explain themselves. If they don’t, then good riddance, they were never a real friend in the first place. 
 

How to respond when a friend ghosts you if you have no idea why

Sometimes someone we care about drops off our radar for no clear reason at all. In these cases, the most important thing to convey is your shock and confusion at their sudden absence from your life and your inbox. 
 

21. Hey, everything okay? It’s been weeks since we talked and I feel really confused by the fact that you aren’t responding. 

When confronting someone for ghosting you, don’t feel that you have to keep up some kind of happy pretense. Honesty about your feelings is the best policy. 
 

22. Hey, you alive? 

This is a good message to send if you don’t want to do all the emotional labor of crafting a perfect text message. 

I mean, after all, it isn’t okay to just disappear on someone. 

Just ask if they’re alive. Who knows, they may just have been incredibly busy, find this text funny, and get back to you right away. 
 

23. Hellooooo?!? Is this still your number? 

No need to be shy. Asking someone if you are still texting the right number gets across the message that there is no other good explanation for why they have just stopped responding. 

And saying “Hellooooo?!!” will let your friend know just how exasperated and confused you are by their decision to ghost you. 
 

24. So, are you still coming to my event on Monday? Just asking because I’m counting on you, but you seem to have dropped off the face of the earth. 

If someone has stopped responding in advance of plans you have, it is fair to check in with them to make sure they still plan on keeping them. 

Especially if the plans are for something very important to you, for example a birthday party or a christening, it is more than fair to ask for clarity. 
 

25. Do you live under a rock now, or what? 

If you want to keep the tone lighthearted so that your friend doesn’t feel like they have to offer up a groveling apology in order to start talking to you again, ask them if they live under a rock now. 

Who knows, you may just make them smile and remember why you were friends in the first place. 
 

26. Earth to [insert name], I repeat, earth to [insert name].

Another funny way to approach being ghosted by a friend is to pretend they are an unresponsive spacecraft. 

This message is silly enough for them to feel that they can reach out to you again easily. 
 

27. Um…what’s going on? Why have you just stopped responding to me?

If you aren’t necessarily in a good humor about the fact that your friend is being unbelievably rude and unreliable, just ask them what is going on and why they aren’t responding. 

No need to beat around the bush, they owe you an explanation. 
 

28. Hey. Um, do you want to explain why you’ve been ignoring my calls for weeks? 

This is a similarly straightforward response to being ghosted. If someone has been dodging your calls, just ask them why. 
 

29. So, I guess we’re not friends anymore? 

This is a good message to send someone who has been ghosting you for a long time. 

If you’re at the end of your rope with someone and just want clarity from them about the status of your friendship, then ask them this. 
 

30. Like, I swear at this point I’m worried you’ve died…what on earth is going on? 

If you are totally fed up but still want to keep a sense of humor, send the friend who has ghosted you this message. 

Your frustration will be palpable, but so will the fact that you are still a funny, understanding person who would be very happy to hear from them. 

How to Respond to an apology when you are still hurt

Saturday 30th of April 2022

[…] example, when a friend ghosts you, you don’t have to forgive them right […]