Is there anything more blatantly disrespectful than ignoring someone? There might be.
Ignoring someone and then getting back in touch when it suits you is arguably worse.
If you’re reading this article, it’s safe to assume you recently met someone you liked.
You thought things were progressing well…until they simply stopped responding to your messages.
Maybe you had been on a date, or maybe you were just spending your evenings chatting on an app.
However well you knew this person, you were probably confused when your chat thread went silent.
However hard that time was, you presumably moved on, dealt with the hurt, and were feeling good again.
Then, just when you were over the hill…the ghoster popped back up in your notifications.
If you’re overwhelmed by having to come up a response to someone who ghosted you, don’t worry.
Enjoy reading this comprehensive list of possible ways to reply when a ghoster comes back. Rest assured that by the end of it, you’ll know what to say.
42 Brilliant Responses when a Ghoster Comes Back
- Woah, woah, woah. Back up. What makes you think you’re still welcome in this inbox?
- Sorry, who is this?
- Is that an autocorrect of “I’m sorry that I disappeared off the face of the earth”?
- Thanks for getting in touch. Unfortunately, your account was closed due to inactivity.
- You see that little “send” button in the bottom-right corner of our chat? Your right to press it has been revoked.
- If it isn’t the ghost of dates past.
- Why are you talking to me? I thought we’d established you don’t really like doing that.
- You’re alive!
- How much of my time are you planning to waste this time around?
- Did I forget to block you? I must remedy that immediately.
- Oh no! My phone is haunted…I’ve just seen a ghost.
- Is it Halloween?
- Sorry, but I’m not a medium. I don’t know how to talk to ghosts.
- I didn’t know ghosts said anything other than, “boo!”
- Are you always this unreliable, or do you do that especially for me?
- You sure know how to make a girl feel special.
- I love being ignored for months on end, so thanks for that!
- Oh…you better be ready to do some serious groveling.
- You must be mistaking me for someone with lower self-worth.
- I should have known all along you were a ghost…you had no substance whatsoever.
- How long until you get bored and stop replying to me this time around?
- This response is more than you deserve because it shows more consideration than you gave me. Here’s my message: I’m not interested in talking to you.
- I was genuinely worried that something might have happened to you.
- Is everything okay? I haven’t heard from you in ages.
- I’m willing to revisit things, but only if you show me more respect than you did last time.
- If you want to keep talking, I’ll need you to be more consistent with your communication.
- You really hurt my feelings when you ghosted me. I’d like an apology.
- Being ghosted wasn’t fun. We can’t just pick up where we left off, you have to earn back my trust.
- What are you going to do to make your radio silence up to me?
- You’re brave to come back around these parts.
- Well, well, well, look who’s crawling back with their tail between their legs.
- Why have you gotten back in touch after all this time?
- In your absence, I’ve actually met someone great. I’m in a wonderful relationship now, so please don’t get in touch with me again.
- Sorry, I think I’ve seen too many red flags to want to stay in touch.
- Lol bye.
- If you think you’re going to get another chance, you’re deluded.
- I would never disrespect myself by going on another date with someone who ignored me for weeks.
- As far as I’m concerned, you ended whatever relationship we had when you ignored me.
- I don’t have anything to say to you.
- I’m going to be straight with you: I’m still angry and I don’t want to talk to you.
- Whatever we had ended when you decided to ghost me.
- Sorry, I’m not at your beck and call.
Funny responses when a ghoster gets back in touch
Humor allows us to deliver harsh messages without sounding angry.
When you’re dating someone, it’s usually better to be straightforward and not to play games.
However, if someone has ghosted you, all the rules pretty much go out the window.
Considering how much the person getting back in touch has disrespected you, you’re entitled to make a funny jab at their expense.
Plus, it might help you feel better to get some of your frustration off your chest.
Here are some hilarious ways to reply when someone who has ghosted you gets back in touch.
1. Woah, woah, woah. Back up. What makes you think you’re still welcome in this inbox?
In many ways, your text message inbox is like a modern doorstep. It’s where people go to get your attention.
Have you ever heard the idiom, “to darken someone’s door”? Well, it basically means to unexpectedly arrive at someone’s house.
It usually describes an unwelcome visitor who blocks out the light inside a house by standing in the doorway.
This is basically what your ghoster is doing to your 21st century “doorway.”
This response to someone who gets in touch after having ignored you for weeks on end is funny, because it makes it sound like you’re literally asking them to back away.
Send a ghoster this 21st-century version of a “no trespassing” sign to make it clear you don’t want to hear from them again.
2. Sorry, who is this?
If someone ignores you, let them know that two can play at that game.
This funny message lets you pretend you don’t know who they are.
After all, how are you meant to remember them after all this time?
Whether a guy knew how to be a gentleman on a date or not, one good first impression does not remedy a total lack of consideration afterward.
3. Is that an autocorrect of “I’m sorry that I disappeared off the face of the earth”?
Surely, you would rather respond to a girl saying she’s seeing someone than wait around for weeks with no idea whether she is still interested in you.
If someone does stop responding to you without explanation, you’re right to demand an apology.
To add humor to your request for an “I’m sorry,” you can ask whether their lame response was actually an autocorrect of whatever you think they should have said.
4. Thanks for getting in touch. Unfortunately, your account was closed due to inactivity.
We’re all extremely familiar with autoreplies.
Whether you’re trying to unsubscribe from a streaming service or change your banking address, chances are, you’ll get an automated message back.
Is there anything more frustrating than talking to a robot when you’d like to be talking to a person?
Well, maybe. Maybe it’s more frustrating to be ignored by an actual human who is definitely getting your messages.
You can pay homage to the frustration you felt when you were being ghosted with this hilarious fake autoreply.
5. You see that little “send” button in the bottom-right corner of our chat? Your right to press it has been revoked.
Most people would rather respond to a rejection text from a guy and then get on with their lives than spend days waiting for their phone to buzz.
If you want to express the extent of your frustration at being ignored, you can use this funny message to tell a ghoster you don’t want to hear from them again.
6. If it isn’t the ghost of dates past.
Let’s be honest: If a guy ghosts you and then gets back in touch, he’s probably spent quite a lot of time trying to come up with good things to say to a girl who is mad at you.
Whatever he comes up with, whether he’s showering you with compliments, apologizing, or acting like nothing is wrong, you shouldn’t let his bad behavior slide that easily.
Even if you would actually like to give him another shot, make him work to get back in your good graces.
One way to do this is to challenge him with this clever response, which is a reference to the “ghost of Christmas past” from Charles Dickens’ novella, A Christmas Carol. The ghost appears to Scrooge to give him a chance at redemption.
If nothing else, this literary reference will let a guy know he needs to seriously step up his game if he wants to date a smart girl like you.
7. Why are you talking to me? I thought we’d established you don’t really like doing that.
This is a funny way to throw someone’s disrespectful actions back in their face.
Instead of saying you don’t want to talk to them, you can point out that they’ve been pretty clear about the fact that they don’t want to talk to you.
8. You’re alive!
The joke you’re making with this pointed exclamation is that when the person you’re talking to stopped responding, you thought they might have died.
What you’re expressing is that you’re surprised to hear they’re still among the living.
9. How much of my time are you planning to waste this time around?
If you were genuinely upset when someone ghosted you, you don’t have to pretend everything is okay.
This message wraps the statement, “you wasted my time” up in a humorous cloak.
But don’t worry, your feelings will still be understood perfectly.
Maybe you spent hours of your life responding to dry texts from a guy before those texts eventually dried up altogether. That’s a lot of investment in a relationship that was clearly not a priority for the guy who ghosted you.
10. Did I forget to block you? I must remedy that immediately.
The only way a ghoster can get back in touch with you after they’ve made themselves scarce is if you don’t block them.
If you have no desire to talk to someone who has treated you poorly, you can treat a message from them as a reminder to permanently cut off all contact.
And of course, letting them know what you’re doing with this witty message will make the whole thing a lot more satisfying.
11. Oh no! My phone is haunted…I’ve just seen a ghost.
Ghosters don’t always realize how they’re perceived by the people they stop responding to. In fact, there are a good few people who won’t understand this reference right off the bat.
Forcing them to reflect on what you mean will probably lead to a much-needed wakeup call about how they treat other people.
If they take it badly, you may find yourself responding to someone calling you dramatic.
But hey, who cares? All you’ve done is stand up for yourself.
12. Is it Halloween?
This is an even more subtle way to tell someone they’re a ghost without spelling it out.
Essentially, you’re making fun of them with this message.
But you’re doing it so cleverly that they won’t get what you mean until they really think it over.
Hopefully, by the time they get your point, they’ll be blocked. After all, you’re on to bigger and better things, right?
13. Sorry, but I’m not a medium. I don’t know how to talk to ghosts.
For another funny ghost-related reply, consider telling the apparition in your life that you can’t talk to spirits.
A medium is basically a psychic who talks to people’s dead relatives and acts as a bridge between the dead and the living.
Asserting that you aren’t a medium is a great way to call someone out for bad behavior without having to become too vulnerable.
It can be hard to communicate that you feel hurt to the person who has done the hurting.
Instead of exposing yourself to more potential pain, you can wrap up your feelings in a joke and deliver them that way instead.
14. I didn’t know ghosts said anything other than, “boo!”
This message might result in you having to reply to a guy calling you crazy, but if he does, all it means is that your joke has hit a nerve.
And we all know that if a joke hits a nerve, it’s because there’s more than a little bit of truth in it.
High-value responses to ghosting
Knowing your worth is essential when you start dating. After all, dating isn’t too dissimilar from a negotiation.
Both parties meet and try to establish whether there is mutual interest.
If there is, they move on to the terms and conditions of what an arrangement between them might look like.
Knowing what you bring to the table and that you do not need what the other person is offering is crucial.
Being able to accept that you aren’t someone else’s cup of tea without letting it make you feel like you are worth less is also vital.
If you’re feeling a little bit low after being ghosted, you can channel self-empowerment with one of these excellent responses to a ghoster who comes back.
15. Are you always this unreliable, or do you do that especially for me?
This is an ideal way to call someone unreliable without sounding like you’re too upset about it.
If the ghoster who popped back up in your notifications was always finding ways to get out of a date, send them this message.
The point you’re making is that the person who went quiet on you is not a secure or loyal person. You’re saying you wouldn’t trust them with something important to you.
16. You sure know how to make a girl feel special.
This is clearly meant sarcastically, which makes it the ideal dig at a guy who is anything but gentlemanly.
A lot of men pride themselves on their old-school charm and ability to treat women with respect.
By suggesting that the guy you’re talking to doesn’t know how to do that at all, you’re actually making a pretty significant dig at his manhood.
17. I love being ignored for months on end, so thanks for that!
If the ghoster wasn’t into you, he should have just told you, right? I mean, there are so many great ways to friendzone someone over text.
After all, it’s not like you are asking them to have a difficult conversation in person. All they would have to do is tap out a brief message on their phone.
18. Oh…you better be ready to do some serious groveling.
This ace response to a message from someone who stopped responding to you is the perfect blend of funny and assertive.
Telling someone they better get ready to grovel lets them know that you are not one to forgive easily and that you have high standards for the people you spend time with.
They’ll realize that they managed to get a date worth keeping and then allowed you to slip through their fingers by their indifference.
Hopefully, this will make them get their act together stat.
19. You must be mistaking me for someone with lower self-worth.
Having high standards just means that you don’t accept things that make you feel bad about yourself.
That’s a great thing, and many people-pleasers struggle to get to a point where they feel confident standing up for what they deserve.
This is an excellent response to someone thinking they can just pop in and out of your life at their own convenience.
20. I should have known all along you were a ghost…you had no substance whatsoever.
If you want to make a dig about how shallow, or, well, to be blunt, stupid, someone is, this is a good way to go about it.
Joking that the person who stopped responding to you has no substance ties in nicely with referring to them as an immaterial ghost.
If they’re as thick as you’re making them out to be, they might not get this joke. But hey, that’s kind of the point, right?
21. How long until you get bored and stop replying to me this time around?
This is a perfect way to let a ghoster know that you’re on to them and, well, that you can see right through them (haha).
By predicting that the pattern they have shown you in the past will continue into the future, you’re showing them that the consequence of treating people badly is that they lose trust in you.
22. This response is more than you deserve because it shows more consideration than you gave me. Here’s my message: I’m not interested in talking to you.
If you’d like to make the point that you are showing someone respect that they neglected to show you, you can preface your rejection text by bluntly telling them how you feel.
Then, spell out in no uncertain terms that you don’t want to talk to them anymore.
23. I was genuinely worried that something might have happened to you.
Sometimes when a person stops responding to text messages and calls, it isn’t personal. We all go through tough times.
Anyone who has been in a committed relationship knows that for every sunny day there is a rainy one. As a boyfriend, you have to know what to text your girlfriend when she’s sad, and the same is true the other way around.
If you want to ask someone what went down because you suspect they’ve been having a tough time, this is a good way to bring up the conversation without being too nosy.
24. Is everything okay? I haven’t heard from you in ages.
Instead of immediately assuming that someone has done you wrong, you can check in with them to make sure they are fine.
You don’t have to put aside all the frustration you feel forever.
It is always good to let someone know how they have made you feel.
However, making sure that there isn’t some major underlying reason for their silence is important too.
You wouldn’t want to start getting mad at them only to find out that they have been dealing with a period of poor mental health or the loss of a family member.
25. I’m willing to revisit things, but only if you show me more respect than you did last time.
Up your dating game by never accepting something that feels unacceptable to you.
If you’d like to leave the door open to a relationship with someone because every time you met up with them you saw all the signs that a date went well, you should.
Don’t feel like you’re letting yourself down by giving a ghoster another shot. That said, make sure you spell out the conditions under which you’ve agreed to give them another chance.
And one of those conditions better be that they show you more respect than they did previously.
26. If you want to keep talking, I’ll need you to be more consistent with your communication.
Here is another clear and confident way to demand more from someone if they want to be in with a chance of starting things up again.
27. You really hurt my feelings when you ghosted me. I’d like an apology.
When someone has done us wrong, it can be seriously difficult to move on until we’ve been told they are sorry for their behavior.
Making an apology a condition of being back in each other’s lives is a perfectly fair course of action.
Once you get your, “I’m sorry,” you can decide how to respond to an apology when you’re still hurt.
Just because you’ve asked for the apology doesn’t mean you owe it to a ghoster to accept it.
28. Being ghosted wasn’t fun. We can’t just pick up where we left off, you have to earn back my trust.
Trust is the bedrock of communication, and healthy communication is the key to a fulfilling relationship.
If the issue at hand is that a ghoster has lost your trust, tell them they’ll have to earn it back if they want to start talking to you again.
29. What are you going to do to make your radio silence up to me?
If you’ve been in the dating game a long time and know that ghosting is just part and parcel of it, you might not be that offended that someone has gone quiet. I mean, it’s not ideal, but it’s not the end of the world.
If you’re happy to see a message from someone you haven’t spoken to for a while, you can ask this question.
This flirty response to a ghoster who comes back turns what could be an argument into a fun, light-hearted exchange.
30. You’re brave to come back around these parts.
If you didn’t appreciate being ignored, but equally weren’t head-over-heels in love with the person who ghosted you, you might send them these reply upon hearing from them again.
What you’re saying is that it was a risky move to get back in touch, considering how they left things.
However, the funny tone of your message implies that you aren’t actually angry.
31. Well, well, well, look who’s crawling back with their tail between their legs.
When dogs feel guilty, they come back looking for affection with their tails between their legs.
Most of us have spent enough time around dogs to know what this looks like.
If a ghoster gets back in touch with you with a message full of I’m-ashamed-of-myself energy, you can send them this in response.
32. Why have you gotten back in touch after all this time?
If you can’t be bothered to come up with a clever message and just genuinely want to know what motivated someone to write to you, be as straightforward as you can.
After all, they’ve done you wrong, so you have nothing to gain or lose.
You don’t have to dress up your feelings at all. Instead, ask the questions you want to ask in exactly the tone you’d like to ask them in.
Assertive ways to say goodbye to someone who ghosted you
The cheek of it! If you can’t believe that the person who ghosted you has the gall to get back in touch after how they treated you, you can respond by telling them it’s never going to happen.
Here are some choice ways to tell a ghoster who comes back to get lost for good.
33. In your absence, I’ve actually met someone great. I’m in a wonderful relationship now, so please don’t get in touch with me again.
If you’re happy in a new relationship and someone from your past sends you a message, your first instinct might be to laugh.
“What did I ever see in them?” you’ll wonder.
If you want to let someone know that they’ve lost you for good, send them this incredibly satisfying rejection message.
34. Sorry, I think I’ve seen too many red flags to want to stay in touch.
A big part of the early phases of dating is identifying red flags. What are red flags, you ask?
Red flags in relationships are signs of toxic traits that will lead to disfunction in your partnership down the line.
35. Lol bye.
If you have zero time for the ghoster who is trying to worm their way back into your life, this is an ideal message to send them.
The implication is that it’s funny they even think they still stand a chance with you.
36. If you think you’re going to get another chance, you’re deluded.
To send that same message with absolutely no room for misinterpretation, opt for this crystal-clear response to someone getting in touch after ignoring you for ages.
37. I would never disrespect myself by going on another date with someone who ignored me for weeks.
If the person who ghosted you in the past is now asking you on another date, this message is a perfect way to say no to a second date.
Why would you do them the honor of gracing them with your presence again when they so roundly underappreciated you the last time?
38. As far as I’m concerned, you ended whatever relationship we had when you ignored me.
If things had progressed from just dating to actually seeing each other…and then someone just dropped off the face of the earth, you’re right to be seriously hurt.
If this sounds like your situation, send them this message to make it clear just how much you aren’t interested in going through the whole rigmarole again.
39. I don’t have anything to say to you.
There is no clearer message than this for a ghoster who has let you down and caused you to spend hours wondering what you did wrong.
The worst part about being ghosted is that you don’t get closure about why someone has just stopped talking to you.
You’ll worry that you’ve said something hurtful, or even that something awful has happened to them.
And if all that worry is for nothing, because really the person you liked was just too scared to send you a rejection message, you’ve wasted a heck of a lot of time on them.
40. I’m going to be straight with you: I’m still angry and I don’t want to talk to you.
Telling someone you’re going to be straight with them is a good way to make sure they don’t try to convince you to change your mind.
If you know things are over for you, let the person who ghosted you know that there isn’t even a tiny chance you’ll start up contact again.
41. Whatever we had ended when you decided to ghost me.
Saying this as a statement of fact gives the person who ghosted you no wiggle room to try to convince you to give them another try.
42. Sorry, I’m not at your beck and call.
If the most insulting part about having someone ghost you and then try to come back into your life is the fact that they seem to think they’re entitled to your time, send them this.
Telling them that you aren’t just at their disposal and that you won’t come when they decide they’d like to talk to you is a good way to assert your independence.
Hey, it’s me, Steven. Dating and relationships have always fascinated me. On Dategosu, you will find my best tips to make sure your next date is a great success!